So every year I come out with an all-white trash team on Selection Sunday. If you don't know what I am talking about when I refer to white trash, let this guy be the perfect example. However, this team is always for college basketball players only. So today I decided to switch it up and use NBA players (pictures included). Here it goes:
PG-Mike Bibby. Atlanta Hawks. There may be some debate as to how white this guy is, but from my observations he is at least 31/32 white. To me that is enough to be white trash.
SG-Mike Miller. Memphis Grizzlies. He has been white trash since his days at the University of Florida. I mean what kind of white guy leaves early for the NBA?
SF-Adam Morrison. Los Angeles Lakers. Who says white trash players can't be love-able? Easily my favorite guy on the list.
PF-Chris "Birdman" Anderson. Denver Nuggets. This one was just way too easy...kind of like Casey's mom. Am I right John (John doesn't read this)?
C-Robert Swift. Seattle Supersonics. The tattoos say it all. He also might the worst player on the list.
Not much more to say. Enjoy.
Friday, May 29, 2009
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Wwhy I hate it (one)
So most of you have probably been to a Cold Stone Creamery at one point because it is the new hip ice cream that you get to pay 5 dollars for. Who doesn't like it? Or even gotta have it? Well I work at one of these lil' fun shops slinging bullshit that we call ice creme, and have decided to share with you the FAQ's you won't find at the company website.
1. Can I have a small(medium, large) size?
-No, you can not because we have three sizes Like it, Love it or Gotta Have it.
2. Can I get a Chocolate Devotion but instead of chocolate ice creme can I have vanilla and instead of brownie can I have cookie dough? Oh and I don't like fudge so let me get caramel instead.
-So, you don't want Chocolate Devotion at all?
3. (Asians) Strawberry Banana Rendezvous. 40 spoons and a waffle.
-Fuck asians.
4. More p-CANS and care-uh-mel.
-Sure, is this good? lil' more.
5. Do you have superman(praline pecan, cookie dough, blue moon, moose tracks) ice cream?
-Why are you here? The grocery store is down the road.
So those are just a selection of the most asked hall of fame and for you viewing entertainment here is a list of common mispronunciations of our signature creations.
-Oreo Overlord -Strawberry Banana Rindevoos -Chocolate Demotion -Apple Pie Ala Mode -Cookie Donut You Want Some More -Strawberry Blonde-e -Germanchocosomething
this, this is why I hate it.
Fuck Shakes and Smoothies
Goodnight Internet
1. Can I have a small(medium, large) size?
-No, you can not because we have three sizes Like it, Love it or Gotta Have it.
2. Can I get a Chocolate Devotion but instead of chocolate ice creme can I have vanilla and instead of brownie can I have cookie dough? Oh and I don't like fudge so let me get caramel instead.
-So, you don't want Chocolate Devotion at all?
3. (Asians) Strawberry Banana Rendezvous. 40 spoons and a waffle.
-Fuck asians.
4. More p-CANS and care-uh-mel.
-Sure, is this good? lil' more.
5. Do you have superman(praline pecan, cookie dough, blue moon, moose tracks) ice cream?
-Why are you here? The grocery store is down the road.
So those are just a selection of the most asked hall of fame and for you viewing entertainment here is a list of common mispronunciations of our signature creations.
-Oreo Overlord -Strawberry Banana Rindevoos -Chocolate Demotion -Apple Pie Ala Mode -Cookie Donut You Want Some More -Strawberry Blonde-e -Germanchocosomething
this, this is why I hate it.
Fuck Shakes and Smoothies
Goodnight Internet
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
big smitt dog, 20 pound balls
Chunx does MySpace, the Reverend does Facebook, so I did a name poem, like we did when we were fuckin' 9.
Mname
Apoems
Rsuck
K
I'm right about everything 90% of the time, all of the time, so look out for "The Point" and maybe a face-melter here and there.
Happy, guys?
Mname
Apoems
Rsuck
K
I'm right about everything 90% of the time, all of the time, so look out for "The Point" and maybe a face-melter here and there.
Happy, guys?
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Meet Mike Hazy
My name is Mike Haslett, but most call me Hazy. Others call me the reverend (only Mark), and I have been really pushing for that to stick....unsuccessfully. I would go with the myspace idea that chunx did, but was way too cool for myspace back in the day, and would be completely selling out. Instead I will use a "facebook profile" theme to help me get started (how uncreative are we?).
Network: Michigan State University.
Interested in: Women.
If you knew me already, you would know that we could end the post here. Seriously. However, I will continue on.
Activities: The Izzone, the Crips.
Interests: MSU football and basketball, the Cowboys, the Reds, Kobe, Shawn Johnson (she is almost 18), Erin Andrews, Taco Bell, this video, Thursdays (notice the s), drinking (ok now we have established that I am cool), apparently using parentheses to prove points, and using this website for comedic purposes.
Favorite TV shows: South Park, Scrubs, Entourage, Sportscenter, Trueblood, the Chappelle Show, Eastbound and Down, and any thing on Nickelodeon Gas (what the fuck happened to that channel?).
Favorite Movies: The Sandlot, Jurassic Park, The Shawshank Redemption, No Country for Old Men, He Got Game, The Godfather movies......alright the list is way too long, and I have decided I am almost done boring you.
Favorite Quotes: I really only have one for you...
"I do it cuz it's fun, fun to do bad things."
-Latarian Milton.
Ok fine, here is the video.
Pretty much with me, my expertise involves sports, so that is what I will be likely sticking to. I will also have a section called "the sermon" (remember my self-given nickname). Also, make sure and click the links I provide to maximize the potential of my posts.
That is all.
Network: Michigan State University.
Interested in: Women.
If you knew me already, you would know that we could end the post here. Seriously. However, I will continue on.
Activities: The Izzone, the Crips.
Interests: MSU football and basketball, the Cowboys, the Reds, Kobe, Shawn Johnson (she is almost 18), Erin Andrews, Taco Bell, this video, Thursdays (notice the s), drinking (ok now we have established that I am cool), apparently using parentheses to prove points, and using this website for comedic purposes.
Favorite TV shows: South Park, Scrubs, Entourage, Sportscenter, Trueblood, the Chappelle Show, Eastbound and Down, and any thing on Nickelodeon Gas (what the fuck happened to that channel?).
Favorite Movies: The Sandlot, Jurassic Park, The Shawshank Redemption, No Country for Old Men, He Got Game, The Godfather movies......alright the list is way too long, and I have decided I am almost done boring you.
Favorite Quotes: I really only have one for you...
"I do it cuz it's fun, fun to do bad things."
-Latarian Milton.
Ok fine, here is the video.
Pretty much with me, my expertise involves sports, so that is what I will be likely sticking to. I will also have a section called "the sermon" (remember my self-given nickname). Also, make sure and click the links I provide to maximize the potential of my posts.
That is all.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
me, me, me, it's all about...
CHUNX
I am an unoriginal to the core so i decided to enlist the help of an old myspace survey, you know the ones that used to fill your bulletins section? Well that was before you friended a ton of really terrible hipster bands so you could feel really warm inside. Without further ado...
Name: Chunx
Age: 22
Place of Birth: Kalamazoo, MI
Age: 22
Place of Birth: Kalamazoo, MI
| What's your...: |
| Biggest Fear: Being all by myself |
| Worst habit: Smoking |
| Favorite holiday: Opposite day |
| Some randomness |
| Ever been in a car crash: Yes and I'm dead |
| Have you ever had a crush on a teacher: Does kindergarten count? |
| Do you have any phobias: Height |
| What do you do as soon as you walk in the house: Bang one out |
| If you weren't straight, what person of the same sex would you do: anyone named tom |
| Do you...? |
| Fall in love easily: Yea |
| Like pickles: bread and butter please |
| Prefer to know everything about your significant other, or be regularly surprise: both |
| Have any pet peeves/irritations: too many to list |
| Favorites |
| Color: gun metal grey |
| Gum: Orbit |
| Word: fuckinnnnnn |
| Flower: petfuckyou |
| Back in the Day |
| Age at first kiss: 13 |
| When did you fall in love for the first time: 18 |
| When was your first life defining moment: all day everyday |
| Let's Think Ahead |
| Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Move to Portland |
| Drinking: Yes? |
| Recent past |
| What were you doing at midnight last night: Watching a movie |
| When was the last time you laughed hard: today |
| What was the first thing you thought when you woke up yesterday morning: shit, this early? |
| Space Filler |
| Have you ever fired a gun: 9 mil motherfucker |
| Do you like sports: Yes and i don't care who knows |
| Favorite Month: Fall |
| Who did you see in concert first: 11 |
| Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day: Mark So this is me in a web nut shell, I'm sure you can learn more from up coming posts on all things funny to me and a section I'm calling "why I hate it." Also in the plans is a co-post with Mark on alcohol and movies, possibly doing them at the same time, who knows? We shall see. Goodbye internet. (still looking for a closing line, hmmm, soon i hope.) |
It all starts right here.
This is the beginning of what some might call the end, because when you give us (Hazy, Mark, Chunx, Casey, John) a blog and let the ideas ferment and come to your eyes via computer screen then nothing good can come of it. We will be keeping you updated in all segments of anything you should be caring about. Lots of different minds working on many different ideas. More details on what will be coming down the pipe in the very new future, so keep those eyes peeled and keep your f5 on lock. This is all for now.
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